What’ll You Have?
Place your drink orders here
Posted by: John Chandler on Mar 04, 2009 at 05:11PM
17 Comments
“He enjoys life—as do all who are spared the curse of intelligence.” —H.P. Lovecraft
I may as well add my two cents worth on the subject of Portland being dubbed the unhappiest city in America by BusinessWeek magazine. I never thought of locals as being sad, merely preoccupied with their projects. Let’s see how much time a BusinessWeek reporter has for frivolity while trying to master stilt walking, maintaining a website about kittens, playing in a jug band, and booking gigs for a subversive puppet troupe—all while toiling a back-breaking six hours a week at the co-op. It’s no picnic. Small wonder we’re a city of serious imbibers.
When I notice my own enthusiasm waning, I send out a smoke signal to my rotating cast of degenerate drinking buddies to meet me at some watering hole or other. Granted, this doesn’t make anyone happy as such, but there is something to be said for that old saw about “misery loves company.” Sorrow is definitely a more manageable state in a group setting. Especially while tossing back Tanqueray and tonics.
This issue we have thoughtfully provided you with five compelling reasons to have a stiff drink. I have a feeling we’re just scratching the surface on this topic, so please let me know what you’re drinking and why. It helps to share.
what? being with us doesn’t make you happy?
I work 22.5 hours a week at the co-op, thankyouverymuch.
Being as the economy is in decline, I find myself guzzling champagne like nobody’s business.
BUT…here’s the secret to making it a drink that will brighten the sad Portlander:
add a shot of St Germain (elderflower liquer) before filling your glass with champers.
Elderflower liquer is insanely sweet and french and insanelysweet & french .
It’s like drinking The Sound of Music.
In France.
but what should i imbibe if i’m crocheting a cd-cozy?
remember – it’s always happy hour somewhere on the planet…
current bevvie of choice – good australian shiraz. because i’m in australia and the dollar is strong. and, um, it’s a day that ends in “y”…
Portland is the most unhappy city because all we drink is PBR!
And if you’re not drinking PBR, or growing a beard, or owning chickens, or DIYing at the rebuild center, or relocating from New York, or riding a bike everywhere, or wearing skinny pants, or eating a Voodoo Doughnut, or voting for liberals, or trading at your co-op, or growing your own veggies, or composting, or seeing the most up and coming local band’s show, or dancing at the Goodfoot, or not loving the rain… phew! Then you make the other Portlanders that do, sad!
Now I’m sad, I need a Jack and Sour! :(
I’m pretty sure that the Portland picture that companions the BusinessWeek story, was snapped during Red Bull Flugtag, which features zany antics (happy happy!) and jumping off a 30’ pier (suicidalicious!)
That the picture would contain this incongruity, is strangely apropos for a city that is both a post-collegiate playground, and an indie-rock hothouse of stifling self-consciousness.
Along the lines of Kyle Singler, I’ve been waiting for the first Portland bar to offer the Sam Bowie. One part Sambucca, one part Drambouie.
You wished you’d had a Michael Jordan instead.
“Granted, this doesn’t make anyone happy as such…”
Drinking doesn’t make you happy? Pshaw.
i ll just go get my cyanide on the rocks now that i have been labelled, stigmatized, and ultimately, have internalized my unhappy fate based on my location on the globe. now that makes me smile :-)
Ahoy to One of Us and Camille…
“Happy” is just too strong a word. What’s that word for when you experience momentary contentment—or at least don’t feel like screaming for a little while?
Relief.
Dear Business week, you’re correct Portland is the unhappiest city. It sucks here. My hats off to you for getting the word out to your neo-con colleagues. I’d buy you a drink in thanks but I’m afraid a bathtub full of bailout champagne is out of my budget.
All the best
S.B.
City of Misery, Oregon
USA
Not to make everyone rush to a bottle of pills or anything…but a couple of points: 1.Divorce rates may not exclusively indicate ‘unhappiness’ cuz I sure was happy once I was divorced!
2. Insurance data on claims for depression may indicate people accessing health care to not BE depressed, but to actually improve upon that state of being. Just sayin’
BusinessWeek sucks ass.
Dr. Bring Down, we could all learn a thing or two from you.
Although I don’t find Portland to be a particularly unhappy place, I would say that its (relative) affordability means that it plays host to a lot of people who are just sort of getting by, and the ranks of these people can sometime include some genuinely unhappy folks. By way of contrast, I lived in SF for 6 years, a place you’ve got to be making a bit of coin to afford, and people there probably seemed happier on the whole than here in the Rose City. This is not to say that money buys happiness, only that it’s often a lot harder to be happy when taking care of life’s necessities is a struggle. Anyway, that’s my two-bit layman’s economic analysis.
I’ve been cultivating a taste for whiskey & bourbon over the last few years, so a good Manhattan (or some variation thereof) is my drink of choice these days.
Portlanders are not sad. Their humor is just slightly rusty. And true that Canderson re: St. Germain. Try it w/vodka-preferably a local one.
G 2 the M u rock!