Clothes Minded
Nuts! I knew I should have rented a tux!
Posted by: John Chandler on Apr 20, 2009 at 02:00PM
19 Comments
Bummer. I meant to go check out this bar in Old Town called Dirty over the weekend. It’s apparently got a trapeze! I was curious to see if the circus theme carried over to any other aspects of the business plan. Bouncer clowns? Ringmaster DJ? Waitresses bearing drinks on the backs of trained horses? Unfortunately, the sign at the door revealed one of the most draconian dress codes I’ve ever seen!
Let’s see, where to begin: I was wearing shorts. I had on tennis shoes. Worst of all, I was flying a solid-color T-shirt! Clearly this upstanding organization does not care for “my sort.” But you know, I’m used to it. As a paunchy, near-sighted Caucasian male, I’ve been battling this kind of discrimination my whole life. Too bad. I really wanted to try a slice of Dirty Pie. Yep, it’s obviously too classy a joint for the likes of me.
Tags: Bar Culture Downtown Bars
Umm….that’s weird. I think my favorite is “No Jerseys”. What the hell does that even mean?
Who has the job of measuring the bagginess? Does he/she have regulation-sized hands? Cause otherwise, this wouldn’t be fair.
Trust me: You’re better off for not meeting Dirty’s standards. Isn’t “dirty pie” what got Domino’s in trouble a couple weeks back?
“My favorite is “Unnatural Dentistry”, which seems more important than “Weapons.”
And then “No Hats” as well as “No Beanies.” Aren’t beanies hats, or do they mean Beanie Babies (ha)?
Also, “No Jerseys”; isn’t a jersey, sports attire?
Doesn’t the statement at the bottom really cover anything? Why have such a list?
Solution: Strip naked!
I thought it said “Unnatural Density.” So you can’t be too fat or too thin.
Thats right you couldn’t hang cuz your not class. Go to your ironic indie-hipster joints and let us have our scene and we will have the laaadddies
i think it is meant to be tongue-in-cheek evocative. It’s really a triple entendre
…and dirty is a metaphor(e). I happen to appreciate yon front signage… alas, i doubt that i shall ever taste this place – do they deliver?
Uhm…yeah. I’m kinda sorta wondering what bags they’re grabbing on jeans for measurement purposes.
Ugh. I went there once. What a loserama!
Dear Dirty Pie,
Stop being such a Parochial School. Despite your fantasies to the contrary, that’s not where the action’s at.
Or, if you must persevere, at least unify a theme as the writer has suggested, and outfit your bouncers in wimples and rulers, your bartenders in cleric collars, and your waitresses in pigtails and plaid.
They could have made the sign a lot shorter with the two words they really wanted to convey: Whites Only
dirty pie… more like stupid-head pie!
A point of clarification: Dirty is the name of the nightclub. Dirty Pie is the adjacent sidewalk pizza kitchen.
Har—the reviews over at the Barfly site are pretty funny. “Full of Guidos and Stellas:” Story checks out.
hmm. thank you for the clarification.
Wow, where do I start? First, if the Barfly reviewers are correct, the “No Wife Beaters” takes on a whole new meaning. Zinger! Also, it appears that wearing nothing but a pizza is totally acceptable.
What elitist hogwashery! They’d never stand for that kind of thing in Prague, not even on Vaclav Square.