BAR PILOT

Super Bowl Cocktails: The Final Chapter

Even more big-game drinks.

Posted by: John Chandler on Feb 03, 2012 at 12:00PM 1 Comments

This is it! The very last installment of Super Bowl cocktails! Our final two bartenders are Michael Shea from the Rum Club, and Metrovino mixologist Jacob Grier. Take it away, Michael Shea!

“So, on the Superbowl, I am a shot and a beer guy,” Shea says. "Last year when my beloved Steelers went down in flames, I went through a good portion of a bottle of tequila by myself.

“With that in mind, I think that the Super Bowl is a time for a low maintenance cocktail I suggest an Old Fashioned, Manhattan (on a giant rock), or Vieux Carre. The one special trick to making this a good Super Bowl drink is having some big manly tumblers and giant chunks of ice. Buy a block of ice and cut it down, get some old-school metal trays or buy some new-fangled Tovolo silicone trays. You want a giant cube of ice that melts slowly in a big-ass double old-fashioned glass.

“My next recommendation is double the recipe for your drink (this is where that giant chunk of ice is key). You don’t want to be getting up from your barcalounger too often to freshen your drink. Yes it’s gluttonous, but do you really want to pull yourself away from the half-time trainwreck? The other option is to pre-batch a pitcher of cocktails and keep it in the fridge to occasionally replenish.

Rum Club Old Fashioned (Double recipe for home without special bitters)

Two Sugar cubes
Big Peel of Orange
4 dash Angostura bitter
4 dash Orange bitter

Lightly Muddle all of the ingredients together in your big-ass glass. The sugar should dissolve.
Add a giant chunk of ice.

3 oz. good aged rum (we use Bacardi 8 here)
1 oz. Smith and Cross Navy strength

Stir until the sugar is incorporated, sit down, watch kick-off.

Vieux Carré (Double Recipe)

1 1/2 oz. Rye Whiskey
1 1/2 oz. Cognac
1 1/2 oz. Sweet Vermouth
2 barspoons Benedictine
2 dash angostura
2 dash peychaud

Stir over ice and strain into a double old fashioned, Big Fat Cube.

And now, last but certainly not least, Jacob Grier.

“The owner of Metrovino, Todd Steele, is a big 49ers fan, so he’s a bit bitter about this year’s Super Bowl,” Grier explains. "In recognition of that, this is a cocktail made with San Francisco’s favorite bitter liqueur, Fernet Branca. We call it the Bitter End.

Bitter End

1 oz Fernet Branca
1 oz B. G. Reynolds’ orgeat
1 oz lime juice

When the wrong team scores, shake this with ice and strain into a rocks glass.

Thanks a million to all our rock star bartenders for dropping a knowledge olive in our martini!

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Tags: Super Bowl party, Super Bowl cocktails, Michael Shea, Jacob Grier

Son of Super Bowl Cocktails

Serious drinks from B & F’s Brandon Wise

Posted by: John Chandler on Feb 01, 2012 at 12:00PM 2 Comments

Brandon Wise shakes up another winner.

As promised, we’re back with more scintillating cocktail ideas that should make your Super Bowl Party the social event of the season. Beaker & Flask barman Brandon Wise responded to my request for recipes by sending me a nifty half-dozen. Six points! Please note: these drinks require some fairly fancy pants ingredients, so a trip to a high-end liquor store is likely in your immediate future. Hey, do you want the party to be a hit, or a bust?

Wounded Duck

“Smoky, savory, and all kinds of amazing. Sort of an old-fashioned meets a manhattan cocktail with a little culinary flair, this is what Don Draper would drink after a successful hunting trip,” opines Wise. “Trust me, there is no better pairing with beef jerky known to man.”

2 oz duck fat-washed rye whiskey
½ oz hickory infused punt e mes Italian vermouth
barspoon maple syrup
2 dashes angostura bitters
1 dash orange bitters

Build ingredients in mixing glass, add ice and stir short for about 5 seconds. Strain into bucket glass over large ice cube(s). Garnish with a cherry and/or orange zest if you’re feeling fancy.

Fat-washed rye: Start with ¾ of a bottle of Old Overholt rye and fill the rest of the bottle with rendered duck fat while still hot. Cap and place in freezer for 4-6 hours. Remove from freezer and strain at least twice through cheese cloth until all solid fat has been removed. Voila, savory rye whiskey!

Hickory Vermouth: drop a handful of applewood & hickory chips (I make sure to rinse them well with boiling water first) into a bottle of vermouth or put both in new sealed container. Cap and keep in refrigerator overnight (or until it takes on the desired hickory flavor/aroma). Strain twice through cheese cloth and place in fresh bottle.

Zanhorita

“Jack LaLanne must’ve been onto something when he preached the gospel of fresh juices on his info-mercials. He did live to be 170 after all,” Wise says. “This margarita variation takes freshly juiced carrot and tequila and finds a magical harmony that is as delicious as it is dynamic. You know you have one of his juicers in your kitchen cabinet, now you finally have a use for it!”

1.5 oz Reposado Tequila
¾ oz Cointreau
¾ oz lime juice
¾ oz cilantro simple syrup
1 fresh carrot (juiced)

Juice carrot Jack LaLanne style, and build all liquid ingredients in a mixing tin. Add ice, shake, and strain into a well iced, salt-rimmed bucket glass. Garnish with pinch of cumin over the top of the cocktail.

Bone Luge

“A distinctly Portland phenomenon that is catching fire all over the nation and, along with Laurelhurst Market, Beaker and Flask was amongst the first to entertain this ridiculous drinking trend,” Wise explains. “Bone marrow being a delicacy all its own, once the marrow has been devoured from the bone you can use it like a liquor luge. It’s easy: just pour a shot of whiskey down the channel of the bone straight into your face. Hooray for booze, and hooray for meat! Check out boneluge.com to see what it’s all about.”

B. Wise Red Beer

“Let’s face it: drinking cheap beer gets old fast,” Wise says. “Why not spice it up a little at halftime with this zesty Red Beer recipe? Sure, you can buy some pre-mixed bloody mary mix at the store OR you could try making your own with a bit more zing to it. Here’s a simple recipe.”

1 Can of Cheap beer (PBR or Miller High Life work great)
4 oz bloody mary mix (see recipe below)
Pour into Salt & pepper rimmed pint glass & enjoy

Bloody Mary Base

3 LARGE (46oz) Tomato juice cans
16 oz lemon juice
16 tbl horseradish (microplaned)
4 tsp salt
4 tsp ground pepper
4 tsp celery salt
4 oz sherry vinegar
8 oz worstershire
16 dashes cayenne pepper
8 tsp Tabasco

Grounded for Life

“What pairs better with nachos and 7-layer bean dip than a cocktail that’s a little spicy, a little savory, and a lot refreshing?” Wise gushes. “Not only delicious but also healthful, this cocktail takes the idea of bloody marys and day drinking to a whole new level of awesome.”

1.5 oz Mazima pepper vodka
¾ oz lime juice
¾ oz celery juice
½ oz triple sec
½ oz simple syrup
Dash of Fee’s celery bitters
Salt rim

Shake and strain into salted coupe or margarita glass.

Jimmy Scaffa

“Scaffa (I believe) translates roughly to ‘Cabinet’ in English, referring to reaching into your cupboards and using whatever ingredients you have laying around the house,” Wise notes. “The brilliance of a scaffa is that it’s a style of drink that is typically built in a glass without being shaken, strained, or adulterated. Here’s a quick fix that appeals to wine drinkers and cocktail fans alike and will go great with that shrimp cocktail you’ve carefully set out for your guests.”

4 parts Banks 5 Island Rum
4 parts Barolo Chinato (I like G.D. Vajra)
2 parts Battavia Arrack
1 part Maraschino liqueur
Dash orange bitters

Build ingredients in wine glass or whatever you have at the house, no mixing/shaking/stirring required. Most good liquor stores (like Pearl Specialty in NW PDX) have all of these ingredients and they’re a lot of fun to mix with at home.

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Tags: Bartenders, Beaker & Flask, Super Bowl party, Super Bowl cocktails, Brandon Wise

Pigskin Parties

Where to watch the Super Bowl this weekend.

Posted by: Max Gelber & John Chandler on Jan 31, 2012 at 09:00AM 6 Comments

It seems like just yesterday that ESPN and the rest of the sports world were crying doomsday over a possible NFL lockout and the depressing prospect of a year of football-free Sundays. How were we to fill that extra time, we asked? Finally going to church? Conversing with our loved ones? Luckily the season was saved, but like all good things it’s coming to an end. We’ve got a few Super Bowl suggestions for those of you looking to find a proper place to enjoy the big game.

If your appetite is out of control, the Buffalo Gap is offering the Man Platter (normally $50) for a mere $35. It’s a staggering, artery clogging heap of wings, chicken strips, waffle fries, onion rings, and nachos that will probably reduce your life expectancy by two years. Pitchers of Coors Light are $6.75.

The Cheerful Tortoise in the Portland State ‘hood will feature Coors Light pints for $2.75 (C’mon people! How about a local brew or two?) and Skyy Vodka Bloody Mary’s for $5.50. And Corona Brewing reps will be in the house to give away a sweet Burton Blunt snowboard.

Eat is throwing a Super Bowl crawfish boil, because nothing screams Giants vs Patriots more than ripping the head off a crawdad and sucking out the delicious meat inside. For those looking to tap into their own competitive spirit, they will be hosting a pre-game foosball tournament and a raffle for a flat screen TV. $2 Trumer Pils all day long.

Free chili and cornbread? Holy cow! It’s not some wonderful dream, it’s really happening over at the Kenton Club during the Super Bowl. And you can wash down all that spicy goodness with $1.50 PBR pints.

The Laurelwood Public House is pouring $3 pints from their dreamy selection of 10 beers on tap all game long, as well as food specials to keep you energized.

On Deck, the Pearl District sports bar, is having $6 Crown Royal cocktail specials as well as $3 pints and $10 pitchers of Widmer brews from kickoff to final play. There will be raffles at halftime and post-game for valuable swag like Crown Royal jerseys, On Deck gift cards, and a Widmer Party Pak.

The forlorn Packer fans over at Saraveza, being the good sports that they are, will be screening the big game with a Meat Raffle at halftime. Mmmmm. Meat.

Rather avoid the whole football hullabaloo? If you could not possibly care less whether the New England Footballers defeat the New York Pig Skinsmen, then buy a ticket and hop on the BarFly bus for their Anything-But-Football Stupor Bowl Sunday bar crawl. Free admittance to bars and clubs, appetizers, and drink specials all day long.

And, as always, check out the nonstop, heart-pounding action over at Animal Planet and the 8th annual Puppy Bowl, which should be way more exciting than seeing Madonna hobbling around the Super Bowl Halftime stage on her walker. We’re putting our money on the deceptively named Fumble for Most Valuable Puppy. Woof!

Don’t think of us as being buzzkills, but we do wish to remind you to be smart, pace yourself, and hydrate when no one is looking. You don’t want to be Tebowing to the porcelain god before sunset do you?

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Super Bowl Cocktails

A great game calls for great drinks.

Posted by: John Chandler on Jan 30, 2012 at 10:00AM 2 Comments

Bartender David Shenaut in action!

Just in case you’ve been living on Newt’s moon colony for the past six months, the Super Bowl is this Sunday. So it’s definitely time to get your shopping list together for that big party you’re throwing. Beer, nuts, chips—these are things your grateful friends will pick up at Plaid Pantry on the way over as their meager “contribution” to the pigskin party. As the host, it’s up to you make the cocktail decisions. Yes, you could try to make it through the endless coverage of this sacred broadcast with beer only, but it’s not worth it. Not if you want a positive Twitter reaction, and I know that you do.

I queried some of the city’s top bartenders for can’t-miss cocktail recipes for Super Bowl Sunday. In fact, I got enough to parse them throughout the week. Lucky you! Needless to say, if you have a cocktail that’s a real wowser, please send it along. Don’t leave all the fun to the professionals!

The first recipe comes from the incomparable David Shenaut, who’s worked behind the stick at Zeus Cafe, Beaker and Flask, Teardrop Lounge, and Rum Club, just to name a few stops. He’s also a past president of the Oregon Bartenders Guild, so this man knows his way around a jigger.

The Souracher

3/4 Rye (100 proof)
3/4 Campari
3/4 Cocchi di Torino
3/4 fresh Lime juice
shake
spicy ginger beer top it off
Lime wheel

“The Souracher is an equal parts drink so you could batch this up ahead of time,” Shenault says. “Put the rye, vermouth, lime, and campari all in one bottle and let your guests shake 2 oz of the mix then top it with ginger beer. This drink is super refreshing and acts as a nice clean dry and bitter balance to those spicy wings and meatballs served on game day. Pink enough for the ladies and whisky enough for the men. Great cocktail to have between beers.”

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Tags: Bartenders, David Shenaut, Super Bowl party, Super Bowl cocktails

First Impression: High Dive

Location, location, location

Posted by: John Chandler on Jan 27, 2012 at 12:00PM 4 Comments

What: The High Dive

Where: 1406 SE 12th Ave. 503-384-2285

Why: It’s a 12-table rustic-modern hole in the wall with lots of knotty pine, located just north of Cartopia, the bustling food cart pod at SE 12th and Hawthorne. Co-owner and bartender Bob Jones is an affable fellow who pours a stiff (and affordable) drink. “We just a wanted a neighborhood bar to drink in,” he says, and that’s certainly the case here. The High Dive had a “friends and family” opening on New Year’s Eve, and since that time, Jones has developed a symbiotic relationship with the food carts next door, encouraging patrons to visit Cartopia, buy something, and then eat it at The High Dive, accompanied by one of his four tap beers (currently Rogue Yellow Snow IPA, Ninkasi IPA, Burnside Brewing’s Oatmeal Pale, and PBR) or a $5 glass of Jameson’s Whiskey.

Crowds are sporadic for the time being, but once the warm weather returns, and the outdoor seating is set up, late-night Cartopia revelers will finally have a place to clink their glasses. Jones’s short-term plans include getting a specialty cocktails menu and a TV up for Blazers games. As for me, I look forward to slipping next door for a fennel sausage pie from Pyro Pizza or an order of poutine from Potato Champion, and taking it back to the friendly confines of the High Dive for another glass of Jameson’s.

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Tags: Southeast Portland, Food Carts, New Bar, High Dive

Singing the Brews

Wow & Flutter buys fans a beer

Posted by: John Chandler on Jan 24, 2012 at 03:00PM 4 Comments

Who says all the great ideas have been taken? Behold, an example of thinking outside the box that leads to a very savvy marketing campaign. At Saturday’s record release party, veteran Portland band Wow & Flutter will be giving its legions of fans a download code for a new EP, Double Deuce (Jealous Butcher Records). Now here comes the innovative part: The download code will be emblazoned on a wax seal that tops 22 oz. bottles of Double Deuce Imperial Ale from Alameda Brewing. Think of it: This could become the ultimate marriage of commerce and culture. Soon, every product imaginable, from light bulbs to toilet paper, could come with downloadable tunes. Everything’s a commodity, right? Consumer goods become just a little bit hipper and starving artists get some walking-around money. Win-win.

Drummer Jack Houston, who bottles beverages for Green Bottling Company, figures it’s a sweet deal for everyone. “Our fans tend to be drunks and derelicts,” Houston explains. “This way, they’ll end up buying several copies of the album. And we won’t be stuck with a lot of CDs taking up valuable space in our homes.” Houston says that Alameda head brewer Carston Haney is one such fan—and that he also happens to suffers from synesthesia, a condition that causes him to experience sound as a sensation he can taste in his mouth. “So he wanted to brew something that tasted like our music—you know, classy, strong, and expansive.” Wow & Flutter has been around in one form or another fo more than 15 years, and in that time their music has evolved from immense glacial soundscapes, to buzzy, clattery, punk-infused songs reminiscent of Archers of Loaf, the latter of which describes where the band is at on their new album. “Tighter, shorter, more effective songs,” Houston says.

The CD release party is Saturday, January 28 at Kelly’s Olympian. At press time, the band hasn’t settled on a price for the beer/album two-fer, but Houston promises it will be more than fair. Wow & Flutter: You will drink them up. Meanwhile, here’s a band video from the PDX Pop Now Festival from 2005.

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Tags: New Beer, Alameda Brewing Company, Wow & Flutter, Kelly's Olympian

First Impression: Sasquatch Brewing Company

A new home for brews, bites, and babies

Posted by: Sarah Moore on Jan 23, 2012 at 04:00PM 3 Comments

If your weird uncle polished up his floors to a high sheen, bought a bumload of brewing equipment and a whole bunch of classy wooden furniture, and started cranking out gourmet popcorn and toothsome cheese platters, his place would probably look a lot like Sasquatch Brewing Company, a spanking new gastro-pub located out on Capitol Highway. Sporting Southwestern wall hangings, a mounted buck head and a variety of eclectic art—not to mention the requisite ginormous beer-selection-bedecked chalkboard—the place maintains a fun garage-sale charm with none of the spiderwebs. It’s family-friendly vibe, far from detracting, adds to the allure of this refurbished Portland rambler.

Prospective visitors should be advised that, while cozy and cheerful, the bar area has limited seating. Groups should plan to gather around tables, and while doing so, enjoy some of the wonderful food on offer, such as beet fritters with chevre, or buttermilk fried chicken. During happy hour, peckish patrons can munch on excellent fries or house-made herbed popcorn for $2, warm olives or a honeyed pretzel for $3, and the house burger for $6. With its comfy chairs, broad rain-spattered windows, evening candles, and able serving crew, Sasquatch is as good a place to duck in and grab some chow as it is to stay and chill for an hour, two, three…up to you, really.

Live music is in the works and on February 21, giant ape enthusiasts can come meet notables from Animal Planet’s Finding Bigfoot and learn more about the pub’s elusive namesake. In the meantime you can partake of a wide selection of worthy craft beers (e.g., Oakshire’s Overcast Espresso Stout or the venerable Fred Ale from Hair of the Dog) while anticipating the arrival of Sasquatch’s own house beers; among those planned are a few IPAs, a brown ale, red ale, and a light session ale, all made with Northwest ingredients.

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Tags: New Beer, New Bar, Sasquatch Brewing Company

Our Beer Bars Rule!

Draft Mag knows how to rate ‘em

Posted by: Sarah Moore on Jan 18, 2012 at 04:00PM 0 Comments

Last time we checked, Oregon accounted for only 2 percent of the nation—without the territories!—and Portland for a significantly smaller fraction. Yet according to Draft Magazine, the tap-tuned publication for lovers of beer and its attendant culture, our beloved burgh captured a survey-best six of the Top 100 Beer Bars in America, beating out such worthy contenders such as Seattle, Milwaukie, and Chicago.

Though math isn’t our forte, we’re pretty sure this means our beer brigade is doing some heavy lifting, barrel-style, and we’re sitting pretty at No. 1. Portland’s unofficial Most Best Bars award is a credit to drinking destinations like Apex, Belmont Station and the Green Dragon. The list also includes Bailey’s Taproom, a cozy catch-all for great Oregon beer, the Horse Brass Pub (middle name: unstodgy old-timey British craft beer fun) and Saraveza, cheerfully and beerfully Midwestern. Conclusion? We like your style, Draft.

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First Impression: The Old Gold

There’s a new kind of cocktail in the neighborhood.

Posted by: Kate Degenhardt on Jan 16, 2012 at 04:00PM 1 Comments

Photo: Kate Degenhardt

The OG Mule (left) and Not a Cosmo cocktails both feature locally-made Brew Dr. Kombucha.

What: The Old Gold

Where: 2105 N. Killingsworth

When: Mon-Tues 4pm-12am, Wed-Thu 4pm-1am, Fri 4pm-2am, Sat 12pm-2am, Sun 12pm-12am. Happy Hour Every Monday-Friday, from 4-7pm.

Why: Next to a backlit wooden bar, a massive chalkboard boasts an impressive selection of 19 whiskeys. Soul and Motown music plays and a flat-screen is perched in the corner. Pop art rendered by bearded hipsters and a wooden White Stag sign adorn the walls above high-backed booths and metallic tables at this cool-but-cozy neighborhood joint. One of the booths even boasts a champagne button! Press it and a bartender will dash over with some bubbly. Chances are you might find former Portland Mercury music editor Ezra Caraeff, one of the co-owners, behind the bar, polishing Blazers glassware and dissing the skills of Houston Rockets forward Chase Budinger.

The eight specialty cocktails all hover around seven bucks, but well drinks and beers are relatively cheap and the half-dozen taps range from crafty (Hopworks Hub Lager and Double Mountain Vaporizer!) to blue collar (Rainier!). There are bar snacks like hand-popped popcorn with curry and nutritional yeast and white bean chimichurri dip. And during Happy Hour you can take a dollar off the vegan Tofu Bánh Mì or the Elk Burger with dried cherry relish and Fontina.

What makes the cocktails special? The inclusion of the fizzy, tangy, probiotic tea known as Kombucha, the health drink that has gained a sturdy foothold in beverage-obsessed Portland. Kombucha is slightly alcoholic due to its fermentation process, but it’s still viewed with skepticism in a saloon setting. The symbiotic glop of bacteria and yeast sits in a vat of tea for one or two weeks before it is ready for consumption. Unsurprisingly, hippies love it. Surprisingly, its earthy flavor mixes very well with liquor. Those who already love the bubbly brew can probably imagine how well lemon ginger cayenne Kombucha tastes with tequila—yum!

The Old Gold uses locally made Brew Doctor Kombucha in a lot of their signature cocktails. Monopolowa Vodka, fresh lime juice, mint, and Brew Dr. White Rose Kombucha make up the the OG Mule (the acronym refers to Old Gold, not Original Gangster, but this drink is so fresh I doubt Ice-T would mind if his album name was co-opted). Fans of floral-flavored concoctions will love the Not a Cosmo, made with Ketel orange, cranberry liqueur, lime, simple syrup and Brew Dr. White Rose Kombucha.

Not feelin’ the Kombucha? Sip on the Sam Elliott–absinthe and root beer on the rocks. The menu even has a convenient “Shot and Beer” section perfect for jump starting a pre-game buzz. Try “The Ozzie,” (Tecate and a shot of tequila) and the “The Ryer” (A half-pint of Boneyard Backbone Chocolate Espresso Stout and a shot of Bulleit Rye). At this bar, Kombucha has ditched its Birkenstocks and donned a flattering cocktail dress. For those who appreciate good whiskey and are in search of a comfortable neighborhood hangout, the Old Gold’s the perfect place to grab a shot and a beer and catch the Blazers game.

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Ale Alert!

Cold ones for cold weather

Posted by: Sarah Moore on Jan 11, 2012 at 01:00PM 2 Comments

The first course for Full Sail’s January Brewmaster Dinner will feature proscuitto-wrapped melon with eggs and sausage.

As the bright lights of the holidays fade and with several gloomy months of winter stretching before us, we enter that extra-Portlandy time of year where fuzzy slippers become a necessity rather than a luxury, the rain on the roof gets a little less romantic, and the public breaks out in a bad case of the flannels. The solution, of course, is beer, and thankfully January’s calendar is more than up to the task.

Full Sail Beermaker Dinner

In a whimsical return to childhood tradition—belied only by four servings of beer—the Jan 13 menu will feature entrees breakfast for dinner. Pop in the car and and head to Hood River (just over an hour away) to experience four AM-inspired courses, courtesy of Full Sail Pub chef Jeff Baldo, paired with ales from brewmaster Jamie Emmerson, as part of their Brewmaster Dinner series. On offer: soft-boiled eggs, crab cake benedicts, pork chops with breakfast potatoes, and blueberry blintzes. Held the second Thursday of every month during fall, winter, and spring, the dinner takes place in the tasting room & pub, costs $30 per person, and runs from 5 PM until they run out of grub.

Second Annual Buckman-Kerns Brewfest

Brewers of Portland’s Buckman and Kerns neighborhoods unite! For the second year running, local breweries will converge to pour some of their most captivating creations, as well as unveil a few new ones on Jan 15. Gracious host EastBurn – a pub that’s long on atmosphere, not to mention Northwest beer, wine, and spirits – will be slinging its award-winning victuals all afternoon. Participants this year include Lucky Labrador, Cascade Brewing, and Burnside Brewing, among other distinguished guests. Admission is $10, which includes 4 tickets (tickets are $1 each; one ticket gets you a taster, four for a pint) and a real Brewfest pint glass…not plastic, so your memories won’t melt in the dishwasher.

Flat Tail Brewing Co. Mustache Rye’d Red Release Party

Girlfriend hating on the mustachio lately? Head somewhere your facial hair will be appreciated, like this bangin’ stache-themed bash, complete with trivia, spoils, and booty, and all the Rye’d Red you can possibly swallow. Brewed with Weyermann rye, Munich malts, and an array of Willamette Valley hops, this sturdy little brew from Corvallis’s Flat Tail Brewing (winner of the 2011 KLCC Microbrew Festival People’s Choice Award), is sure to take everyone for a ride with their showcased beer, available on draught and in 22s. The event is going down Jan 19 at Roscoe’s, Montavilla’s happening home of the “Giant Jenga.”

CellarFest 2012

If you invited all your favorite craft brewers to a party, and they each brought one of their most delicious barrel-aged beers, the result would be CellarFest 2012. Featuring a roster of mellowed brews Bailey’s Taproom has been “sitting on for a while,” the party will kick off at 4 PM on Jan 21 with 4- and 10-oz. pours, and will continue until midnight. Among those making appearances will be brews from Laughing Dog, Lagunitas, Sierra Nevada, and Deschutes Breweries. Admission is not required this year, and though no souvenir glasses or tokens will be provided, for $25 one can buy a calmer experience, slipping in at 2 PM and enjoying more space as well as the reinstated glass and tokens.

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Tags: Beer Festivals, Roscoe's, EastBurn, Bailey's Taproom

Worst Beer in the World

Ratebeer.com lists 50 bogus brews

Posted by: John Chandler on Jan 09, 2012 at 10:00AM 14 Comments

In keeping with the spirit of the season (making endless lists, that is), several thousand members of the ratebeer.com community cast their votes for the Worst Beers in the World poll. Dominated by watery light beers and corrosive malt liquors, there are some intriguing inclusions. For example, the folks at Keystone might want to consider upgrading their corporate mascot, because the presence of mustachioed man of the people, Keith Stone, ain’t cutting it. Keystone Light came in at No. 17 on the list, and Keystone Premium was No. 20.

The absolute bottom of the barrel, apparently, is Olde English 800 3.2, a less potent version of the high gravity lager that’s the choice of hopeless alcoholics and buzz hunters on a budget. As a former imbiber of “OE,” I can’t say that I’ve been introduced to the 3.2 style—nor would I want to be. See, the only reason on God’s Green Earth to drink Olde English is for its 7 percent alcohol by volume. It’s an affordable method of getting your drunk on, if that’s the goal you had in mind for the evening. It’s a harsh, hard, malty brew, that nonetheless, tastes a bit better than similar high-octane swill produced by, say, Camo Brewing, another Miller product that gets my vote as the absolute worst beer I ever tasted. It’s the only one I can remember spitting out, anyway. Lest you cast me as a suds snob, I will point out that I have a certain degenerate fondness for Colt 45 malt liquor. Just like Billy Dee Williams.

What do you think, drinking buddies? What’s the worst beer you’ve ever sampled? Name names and provide tasting notes.

Here’s my review of Camo Genuine Ale. “Rather than coming from a brewery, I think that Camo Genuine Ale began life as some kind of industrial solvent that removes rust from barges. After one drink I was terrified about the state of my health, as if I’d introduced a deadly virus into my system as part of a paid experiment. Best advice? Sobriety.” Your turn!

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Win A Basement Bar!

Widmer Brothers gives away a Kegerator

Posted by: John Chandler on Jan 05, 2012 at 03:00PM 3 Comments

I don’t know about you, but the fact that my basement does not have its own bar fills me with an all-consuming rage. I work my darn fingers to the bone for a number of hours each day, only to come home to a few measly beers stuck haphazardly in the vegetable keeper. Instead of retiring to the comfort of my sumptuously appointed basement bar, I’m forced to quaff a Genese tall boy standing up in the shower while my dogs howl their grievances out in the hall. This is no way for a man to live! But there’s light at the end of my tunnel of despair.

The generous folks at Widmer Brothers Brewing are offering me (and you too, I suppose) the chance to win a primo home bar of my (your) very own. Just head over to the Widmer Facebook page and enter to win once per day. The drawing is scheduled to be held May 14, and the lucky winner will receive a Widmer Kegerator bar (made from reclaimed wood!) and a bunch of Widmer glassware and bar tools, valued at $3000. Think of it: A bar that never closes in your own house. Dare to dream, people!

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