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Arts & Entertainment
DEADHEADS

Brain Train

Zombies invade Portland

By Robert Runyon

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Zombies gathered in Pioneer Courthouse Square for Thrill the World, a program whose proceeds benefited local nonprofit, the Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

This zombie baby brings to mind questions of the types of formula one feeds to undead infants. You could probably find them in Europe. Brain puree?

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

The zombie hunters’ bus, the Firefly, was like a horror movie version of the Merry Pranksters’ Furthur.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Logan Fox was the most enthusiastic zombie of the outbreak. He happily scared anyone nearby.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Zombie clowns. Hope you weren’t planning on sleeping tonight.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Steve Istre is Zombievel Knievel. Overheard nearby: “This Shamwow is picking up that blood really well.”

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

We’re not falling for that one.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Christopher Miranda poses as the undead version of Lucille Bluth from Arrested Development.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Sarah Clemens and Jason Richards pose after a zombie shark attack. “This is the best day of my life,” Clemens said in between moans for flesh.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

The recession has hit the undead hardest as Brendan Skinner takes to zombie-begging.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Todd Slade is a former zombie hunter. Emphasis on the “former.”

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Kat poses with her dog, Cooper the Zombie St. Bernard. He’s not the dog you want rescuing you if you get trapped hiking in the Alps.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Businesses tried in vain to keep the undead scourge from leaving their mark on windows across downtown. The most effective way we saw was to keep a window washer on zombie patrol.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

In some mythical mash-up, the zombie has been crossed with the sunglasses-sporting unicorn. She’s joined by El Zombrero.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

“It’s fun to stay at the Y-M-C-BRAAAAAAAAAINS!”

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

The undead get ready to groove for Thrill the World, a worldwide event featuring zombies gathering in public places to perform the most popular piece of zombie choreography of all time, Michael Jackson’s “Thriller.”

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

Zombie dancers make with the jazz hands. Proceeds gathered from Thrill the World benefited the Sexual Minority Youth Resource Center, a local nonprofit.

View Slideshow » Photo: Kerosene Rose

The greatest zombie of them all, the zombie-Gumby-Michael Jackson (note the sequined glove), wishes PoMo readers a happy Halloween.

Zombie Walk, October 24, 2009

Here’s a brief field guide to the local varieties of undead you’ll see stumbling around downtown and the Pearl when the inevitable zombie apocalypse arrives (based on a true story):

The Bored Zombie: Identifiable by patiently waiting at a stoplight, anticipating the crosswalk sign to turn green. Checks watch often despite inherent lack of concept of time.

The Accessorized Zombie: Identified by holding something, marking a frightening stage in zombie evolution. Some hold weapons such as pipes, while others have their lunch to go, in the form of a dismembered foot or arm.

The Photographombie: The most numerous breed of zombie on hand. Cut from the “Dead and Proud of It” cloth, these zombies take pictures of themselves shambling around the city and later post them to Facebite, the undead version of Facebook.

The Canine Zombie: Marked by having four legs and a snout. Usually said snout is bloody.

The Bride and Groom Zombies: Apparently the zombie attack happened during Labor Day weekend, as a large portion of the undead were dressed in their marital best. Ghouls are the ultimate wedding crashers.

The Hipster Zombie: Marked by skinny jeans, beards, and keffiyehs. Keffiyeh could be used to keep head from falling off.

The Drum Circle Zombie: Lack of life and overwhelming desire for brains has not tempered this zombie’s rhythm. Their beats are even more disconcerting than the typical zombie’s frightful moan.

The Protest Zombie: These zombies come equipped with signs touting clever political positions such as “Zombies were people too!” Did they make these signs before the outbreak? We’ll never know.

The Clown Zombie: Big shoes, red nose, unending hunger for flesh. Truly the most frightening thing known to man.

The Dancing Zombie: The example of the only way to peacefully stop a zombie. Play Michael Jackson’s “Thriller” and they’re biologically compelled to complete the choreography.

Zombievel Knievel: The coolest zombie ever, Knievel combines the (relative) invulnerability of being undead with the awesomeness of jumping a motorcycle over twenty semi trucks.

Check some of these zombies out, along with a few other special ghouls in our online-exclusive slideshow from last weekend’s downtown Zombie Walk.

Thanks for reading!
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