Word on the Street: Pyrophrenic
What Portlanders are saying—or should be.
Pyrophrenic pie-ro-frenik (n or adj)
A person simultaneously afflicted with feelings of stern disapproval for illegal fireworks and a burning, childlike desire to detonate some.
In a sentence: Person 1: “Ugh, I can’t stand it when our neighbors set off bottle rockets over our house. What if one lands on our roof and sets it on fire? Wait—that one was cool! Maybe I should go over to help them!” Person 2: “You’re a total pyrophrenic.” See also: Sparkler sorrow; TNTeetotaler